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Psalm 91 — A hiding place for caregivers

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Is it okay to chat a little? I’ve found myself blessed with an additional morning hour due to fog and icy conditions. Everything’s blanketed in white and gray outside my window.

Ladies, I haven’t forgotten about you.

You’re caregivers. You’re busy wearing many hats. You may be caring for a parent, another relative, or like me, your spouse.

On these extra frigid winter mornings or any day that life gets overwhelming, you just want to hide in a corner, or never emerge from your warm cocoon of blankets. Your own personal retreat. Hey, even just a few minutes of personal space, right?

My daughter is starting to get that — “I see you need some space, Mom.”  (Yeah, like my own personal “time-out” depending on the day.)

Have you ever read The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom? If not, go grab a copy NOW for winter reading. Once you get past the first few chapters, I think you’ll be hooked.

So, I played hookie from writing this blog last Sunday. My daughter and I went next door to our neighbor’s and watched The Hiding Place with her. (Do read the book first.)

Corrie and Betsy, sisters, best friends, and partners in crime — the crime of saving Jews from the death camps. One sister, Corrie, would survive Ravensbrook concentration camp. The other did not. Corrie Ten Boom tells her story.

One particular scene stands out. Betsy is giving thanks for the fleas/lice that share their bunkhouse and beds. Corrie is feeling anything but thankful.

A short while into their stay in “hotel Ravensbrook”,  they discover the cruel guards avoid their bunkhouse? Why? Well, the fleas. Their precious New Testament stays hidden. They are able to have little Bible studies with their bunkmates without getting caught. Light in the darkest of places! A Hiding Place for themselves and others.

“Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge, even the Most High, your dwelling, there shall no evil befall you, neither shall any plague come near your tent;

For He shall give His angels charge over you to guard you in all your ways. They shall bear you up in their hands, lest you strike your foot against a stone.”  Psalm 91:9-12

How is the Most High a refuge and dwelling especially for caregivers?

  • He cares for YOU. “Cast all your care upon Him, because He cares for you.” I Peter 5:7  When you’re pouring out your life for another, it’s tempting to feel neglected and alone. You are not. I am not alone. God’s ear is always open to the cries of the humble.

  • Christ KNOWS all about you. “Before Abraham was, I AM.” Nothing is hidden from His eyes. (That’s a comfort only if you are not hiding from God and His truth.) My loved one is the most complex patient his doctor has seen in 20 some years of practice. That’s not comforting. Knowing God knows ALL is.

  • NOTHING. Not. One. Thing. “Can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.” You can’t be hidden from His face. It’s not possible. Romans 8:31-39

  • It’s okay to ask to be hidden by Him. I’ve asked for shelter and protection many times. “Keep me as the apple of Your eye. Hide me in the shelter of your wings.”  “Keep me from the strife of tongues.” (Oh, dear! That’s another post for another day. — Those tongues can be well-meaning, misinformed, and unintentionally malicious, even in Christ’s body. The Psalmist has a bit to say about that, too.)

Refuge. Shelter. A Hiding Place.  No, not like the ostrich — burying her head in the sand to hide from reality. But like the tiny chick, I’m so small.  I need the shelter of strong, powerful wings.

May He be your Refuge and Hiding Place this week!

 

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Psalms — songs and prayers for every season of care-giving

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A prayer request hit my inbox again this past week with the nasty, six-letter “C” word in it. Cancer.  ” Please pray for us. This season is so hard for my family. It’s the first year without both of my parents.”

She was caregiver for her mom who passed away this summer due to cancer.

Simple words of kindness and comfort, well, these seem like such a small offering in comparison with her pain.

“I’m so sorry. You’re in my prayers.” When you’re in pain, you just want to know that people care.   Warm hugs and gentle words have been healing to my soul.

The year 2017 — a year of great suffering and loss for so many with floods, hurricanes, fires, and savage shootings — just the tip of the iceberg.

Really, isn’t every year a repeat of the story that began long ago of sin, suffering, pain, and death?  Thankfully, Christ’s coming — God with us — shines brightly through the pages of history. Light out of darkness.

The years that we personally grapple with loss and suffering are the ones that sear our hearts and change our lives forever. Then we learn to go on living day by day.

I say this with love and tears of longing for my sis-in-love in heaven. She brightened our lives in such a special way.

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God with us, our Immanuel, speaks words to us — the words we need to hear — of love, comfort, longing, joy, fear, sorrow, pain, repentance, forgiveness, trust, and praise for us to pray and sing back to Him in the Psalms.

Every book of His Word is important. Don’t get me wrong. But the Psalms are the heart-throb of communication between God and man.

There is never a season that we don’t need the Psalms. Never a day I breath, when a Psalm doesn’t meet my heart’s need.

This coming year I thought I would focus on prayers and comfort for caregivers from the Psalms, so near and dear to my heart. My hope and prayer is that this will be a well of encouragement to you also. Right now, I’ve got about 14 topics on the list. Just the beginning…

What topics for caregivers would you like to see addressed from the Psalms? Please let me know in the comment section below.

Many thanks for reading, praying, and sharing with me on this little tiny corner of a blog this year.

 

 

 

 

 

What’s your identity, dear care-giving sister?

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When you’re a caregiver, especially long-term, your whole identity can become wrapped up that term — care-giving!

It’s not all wrong.

If you’ve been put in that position, you’ve been called by God to exercise great mercy and compassion toward someone in need.

Depending on how great the need, your life revolves around this mission.

It’s exhausting. Draining. Sometimes soul-sucking. Like the last two nights for me…We’re waiting for yet another surgery.

Corrective where the last surgery failed to do its job. It’s a six week wait. Meanwhile, the ramifications for my loved one are brutal. Up and down every few hours all day and all night in sheer misery.

I’m not saying this so you can send a boatload of pity my way. No, indeed. I just want you to know I’m walking in your shoes. I get it!

Your life as a care-giver may be totally and completely upside down right now.

You may find yourself careening of the edge of mental and physical wholeness.

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Your relationship to your spouse changes in so many ways, it’s hard to describe them all.

At my wit’s end a few weeks ago, I yelled (not screamed) at my loved one — very ill and refusing to go to the doctor. I almost called the ambulance, but wanted to avoid that drama.  Yelling beat that option, but it wasn’t pretty. I felt like a meanie.

Sure enough, a trip to the doctor was the first stop on the journey of multiple doctor’s visits that led to the revelation of needing a third surgery in 18 months.

Yep, the infection could have been life-threatening, but my yelling possibly saved my loved one’s life. Could I have accomplished this another way? I don’t know.  Honestly, I don’t.

Sick and sorrowful of heart, I needed a healing ointment for my soul.

I found it. Church, God’s people, God’s Word, and time alone with my Heavenly Father.

Am I totally whole now? Is all the hurt left behind. NO! But I know WHO I am in Jesus Christ and WHAT riches of love are mine.

I’m not just a caregiver! I’m a beloved daughter of the King. I’m a joint heir with Jesus. He’s preparing a “forever home” for me, His adopted daughter.

Like Jesus warns us in the Gospel of John, “I have told you these things so that in ME you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But be of good cheer. I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Someone somewhere sagely stated – You’re always in one of three stages in life. You’re entering a great trial. You’re enduring a great trial. Or, you will be enduring a great trial soon.

Life IS hard, but God is good.

HIS goodness endures to all generations, if we will have the eyes to see it.

Right after his Triumphal Entry into Jerusalem, Jesus told the fickle crowds that followed Him (soon to crucify Him instead of praise Him) —

“Yet a little while the light is with you.

Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you.

He who walks in darkness does not know where he is going.

While you have the light,

believe in the light that you may become sons of light.”  John 12:35-36

Don’t stumble in the darkness in days of sorrow!

Believe in your identity in Christ.

Don’t forget who you are in Jesus, dear care-giving sister.

He’s the only Light that is guaranteed to kindle a flame in your darkness.

Faith, hope, love, and peace to you today!

3 ways to care for your child’s heart with a chronically-ill parent in the house…

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I was thinking about sorrow, chronic illness, and the havoc it wreaks on a family.  Then the breaking news about little Mariah Woods scrolled across my news feed. Three years old. Stolen. Possibly killed by a madman of a boyfriend.

Suddenly a friend posted an anniversary post of her husband’s death, purposefully leaving behind his wife and two daughters. My heart broke all over again. The circumstances of his death at the time were almost unbearable.

 

Loreenna McKennitt’s 1985 album, Elemental, features a song, “The Stolen Child.” That last line… the world’s more full of weeping than you can understand… OH. My. Heart.

“Come away oh human child
To the waters and the wild
With a faery hand in hand
For the world’s more full of weeping
Than you can understand.”

I’m a “greenhouse” parent. I believe in sheltering a child’s heart, soul, and life and gradually exposing them to the stormy elements of this life.

 Don’t share my philosophy? This post may annoy you. Please keep reading. Be open-minded enough to at least hear my point of view, okay? You can post your point of view in the comments respectfully.

1.  SHUT off the news! Yep!

Our family news is filtered. Mainly we use the internet for news. We watch a bit of TV.  We almost never watch the news as a family.  It’s just so full of the works of the flesh listed in Galatians 5:19-21:

  • adultery
  • sexual immorality
  • impurity
  • lewdness
  • idolatry
  • sorcery
  • hatred
  • strife
  • jealousy
  • rage
  • selfishness
  • dissensions
  • heresies
  • envy
  • murders
  • drunkenness
  • carousing

“I warn you, as I previously warned you, that those who do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.” (Apostle Paul, Galatians 5:21)

Ever overheard comments like, it’s all bad news?  Kinda matches that list above, huh?

2.) Decide what to share with your child about your loved one’s health issues.

Here’s where it gets sticky. Prayers for wisdom are needed. I’ve seen too much harm done to children when their parents lie to them to keep them happy.

On the other hand, too much information will be too heavy for them to carry in their hopeful little hearts. Just like their growing backs are not meant for heavy loads, so their growing minds, hearts, and emotions can only handle so much.

How much information is too much? That’s a huge wisdom prayer request that not even your best friend forever can fully advise you on.  You can seek input and counsel, but in the end, no one can decide for you. Deciding wisely will impact your child for good or ill.

My daughter just became a teen. For the past year or so, she’s been asking more and more questions. She deserves answers.

I’m not going to pretend everything’s okay. I’m not going to lie and say, it’s all gonna be all right. Since genetic information related to all the autoimmune issues directly affects her health and future, she needs to know more information now.

However, I always assure her that our great God never leaves or forsakes His children. He loves broken people.  He bends down to hear the prayer of the poor and needy. 

Life HURTS madly at times, but God stoops to suffer with us in our afflictions.

A friend of mine lost her husband to a dramatic suicide six years ago today. Her husband burned the house down on himself — literally and deliberately — after suffering with clinical depression for years. My daughter and I had to drive by the haunting burnt shell of that house every month for a few months on our way to work. I couldn’t hold back the tears.

She asked questions. I only gave her the short answer. Why? She knew the girls who lost their father. Her little heart could not handle that crushing load.  Why would someone’s daddy ever do that?

But what of my friend’s children? There was an investigation, of course. She had to handle the information so much differently for them. Thankfully, today they are thriving.

3. Don’t hide in your own hurt and ignore your hurting child.

Busy, busy care-giving momma,  here’s the huge dilemma! Your work load may be almost unbearable. Like a single parent, you carry all the responsibilities at times. Add the care and worry of a chronically-ill spouse to the load, and you feel like you are dead lifting a ton of steel. Maybe someone is there to “spot” you. Maybe not.

Your child cannot thrive without feeling connected. They will start bottling up a world of hurt or acting out their hurts in destructive ways. YOU are responsible for filling their “love tanks”.

Here are a few practical ways to help your child feel loved and cared for even when you’re overwhelmed: 

  • HUG daily.  I make it point, even on the prickly days.  HUGS are huge.
  • Say goodnight. Always say good night. That routine matters even to a teen.
  • Read even just ONE verse of the Bible at night before bed.
  • Encourage a conversation. A flood of hurt might pour out. That’s good. Listening is the biggest deal here.
  • Share a treat together. It’s like opening a package of love and happiness.
  • Try very hard to share at least one meal a day together.
  • Point out good things. Catch them doing good.

No “faery” can take your child or mine by the hand and lead them away from the sorrows of this world.

Instead, Christ’s love and Spirit — that’s what I’m banking on to carry my child through the deep waters and a world full of weeping. God will be a Father to our children when their human father cannot.

Mommas, we are His instruments!

That’s frightening, amazing, and humbling. Mothering in a world full of hurt isn’t for sissies. It’s a harder job than I could have ever imagined.

Will you pray with me and for me?

O, Jesus, God with us, may Your love conquer and lead in our hurting families. Send Your light and truth to guide and protect our ways.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Your suffering isn’t all about you…

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Dear sister, I’m about to bleed with you all over this page,

so hang on and hear me out.

Books upon books have been devoted to the “whys” of suffering.

Why another blog post on this topic?

 Well, I’ve had a tiny little ray of understanding, a bit of sunshine in the darkness.

I’ve felt like I have been shut up in a dark closet lately.

 I’ve wondered if death was just around the corner for my loved one. Is it time?

You haven’t seen me post for a few weeks.

I’ve given until I have nothing more to offer.

 No more spoons to pick up (if you understand the “spoonie” lingo among the chronically ill).

Nothing to give you. Just hanging on to Jesus.

Endless sleepless nights I remind myself, I’m God’s girl.

I’m His beloved in Christ Jesus.

He’s promised me His love never changes for me. I’m banking on that.

How is it that David and then Jesus Himself

could come to a place of such suffering in their lives

 that all they could do is cry out brokenly and wretchedly,

 “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

Why are you so far from hearing my cries?”

 

Have you ever walked through such flaming, scorching times?

I only glimpsed the edges of this suffering during four years

of watching my sis-in-love with stage 4 breast cancer.

 I wasn’t there every week.

What I did see frequently on her “care team” was enough

 to break my heart repeatedly.

I watched the downward spiral of my brother’s health and exhaustion

 and wondered how much more both the cancer patient and the caregiver could take!

It’s my turn in the flames.

I’m watching my loved one suffer excruciatingly both physically and mentally.

 After so many years of physical suffering, the mental battles are equally intense.

 I’m on the frontlines. I’m the primary caregiver and breadwinner.

 Can’t quit. Can’t stop. Can’t resign.

 

There are things you see with burning clarity

 when you are walking through the flames, if you are His beloved.

 If you look with the tear-filled eyes of trust, you see.

God is God. I am not. Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done.

Words from The Lord’s prayer — timeless and true as the eternal Savior

 that spoke them.

He is LORD. Do I really believe that? Then yes. Yes! He’s got a plan from eternity that is right on track. Satan’s going down.

 God will triumph! I’m just a speck of dust in that eternal plan.

Somehow, we do matter in this plan!

“Are you not of more value than many sparrows?”

“The very hairs of your head are all numbered.”
(Mine are falling out rapidly…easier to count!”)

“All things work together for good to those that love God.”

MY life may be the only “Jesus” that some of those around me see. 

How I walk with the broken matters.

I’m Christ’s ambassador to my family and friends.

Do you any doubt after the events of this last month that this is a cruel, hateful world

 that’s turned its back on God? So many terrible things in the news!

 The depths of evil are too dark for us without God’s love.

“Let your LIGHT so shine before men, that they may SEE your good deeds and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

UGLY truth.

 Divorce and abandonment rates among the chronically ill

 and those with cancer is extremely high.

I’ve seen and heard of it with my own two eyes numerous times now.

 Folks who abandon their family at their time of greatest need —

 what kind of love is that?

My daughter needs to see Jesus’s hands and feet lived out in my life.

 

Our mission as parents is to show the mighty acts of God to THIS generation. How?

True lovers of Jesus, 

true children of the Heavenly Father

 don’t abandon the broken,

 the “useless” of society. Jesus did not.

In fact, hurting people are highlighted in the Gospels.

The lepers, the blind, the lame, the sick all came to Jesus in droves.

He came to show us the Father.

He cast out a Legion of demons from a man so extremely broken that he lived alone

 with dead bodies, tormented and naked.

 

Do we think this is a distant fairy tale?

 

Sometimes I think I’ve been guilty of this distancing myself from

what Jesus actually did while here on earth!

This man living naked in the tombs clearly was not sane!

His insanity was due to demon possession.

 (NOT my take on mental illness — that’s a whole different post).

The point is — Jesus became ceremonially unclean 

to even reach out to this man living among dead bodies! 

He did what most good, religious folk of his day would not do —

 and reached out in healing power to this outcast man.

What about serious genetic defects? Why this suffering? 

Many chronic auto-immune diseases have their roots in genetic defects.

So much sorrow in the gene pool! Why?

Jesus spoke truth with power when his own disciples asked, 

“Who sinned, Jesus? This blind man or his parents that he was born this way?”

Broken words like poisonous arrows from a prideful heart,

 similar to words spoken even today to families who are experiencing health issues.

 

Suffering bodies, suffering minds, suffering hearts — Jesus answers the accusers.

He answers the Accuser of our souls, too.

“Neither this man nor his parents sinned.

 But it happened

 so that the works of God might be displayed in him!” John 9:3

What  floods of relief must have washed over this blind man overhearing this!

 How many years had he begged blindly by the side of the road and wondered, WHY?

How many times has your chronically-ill family member, your disabled friend,

your mentally-ill loved one wondered, Why? What am I worth?

 Why am I still living?

Jesus was not saying that this man or his parents were not sinners —

that they had never sinned!

He was saying that this blind beggar could display the works of God in his life

through the power of Jesus!

For the blind beggar, that meant healing here and now.

He met Jesus the King over genetics!

I’m filled with gratitude 

that Jesus knows our sufferings perfectly. 

He’s in the flames with us.

He will help us do the will of the Father.

 

 

I’m grateful to know our sufferings, your loved one’s sufferings,

if committed to Christ,

have purpose and meaning.

His purposes are always good. Hang on! Hang in there with me!

Getting real about fear and faith…

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Last Lord’s Day I heard a sermon on faith.

Abraham was the primary example used, though there are many, many choice examples in Scripture.

“Do not fear, Abram, I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” Genesis 15:1

At this point, Abram doesn’t just say, Yes, Lord. Instead he pops his hardest, most troubling question on God. What about that promised son, God?

Abram (soon to be renamed Abraham) had his doubts and fears.

He brought those fears to God directly instead of running away from God. He talked to God honestly about what was bothering him. His doubts did not mean he had no faith. Fear and faith often work hand in hand.

Faith boldly brings fear and doubt to God!

 

God IS our shield of protection through the fiery storms.

Right here and now we are facing major surgery. We can’t know all the possible outcomes. This surgery is only addressing one of many ongoing health issues. No guarantees! More trouble to come. It’s a fearful spot to live in.

So many friends I know are in similar tight spots. I listen to a lot of uncertainty, fear, and doubts.

” I am your Shield.”

Shields protect and defend. Shields often were emblazoned with the emblem of their cause.  Protection and identification in battle.

I recently heard that the Navy Seals are trained never to swim away, but to punch a shark on the snout should it come close for an attack. The only way to deal with fear is to face it head-on.

Now, did Abram go blazing his fears to everyone? I really don’t think so. This seems to be a very private conversation.

In fact, God got very angry with the 10 spies to Canaan. Why? They came home from Canaan and started spreading their fears to the entire nation. Sadly  the fear polluted everyone’s mind except for Joshua and Caleb!

The devastating result was an entire generation that would never see God’s promises fulfilled. They died in the wilderness wanderings that lasted forty years.

I don’t know about you, but to me that is way too long to camp! I think it is okay to put on a brave face, especially for the sake of your children.

One of the bravest acts I’ve ever personally seen was my sis saying goodbye forever in this life to her two precious children.

I wasn’t actually in the room but waited for the little ones to come out.

With smiles and balloons they said to me after this visit — Mommy might go to see Jesus!

Of course, they didn’t understand the gravity of the situation. But what I DID understand is that brave, loving Mommy didn’t frighten them with her intense emotions. It was a peaceful goodbye. It was a mother’s last act of sacrificial love for her children.

Faith doesn’t allow fear to win. You might be shaking in your boots, but faith in God’s promises propels you forward!

God told Abram to look up and count the starry hosts. Number the stars? Impossible quest even with today’s scientific advances! This impossible number was how many “sons of faith” Abraham would have.

“And Abraham believed God…”  Isaac, the son of laughter, was only one of myriads of sons of faith to come.

Number the stars? Go start listing God’s promises. Our tears will turn to laughter someday.

And it’s okay to shed some tears and fears with a discrete, careful friend. But make sure you run to God first. God is our Shield.

 

Joy unspeakable at the journey’s end…

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Peter was told by Christ that he was going to have walk on a path he didn’t want to go on when he got old. He received a rare gift — insight into his own future.

Church history tells us he was crucified upside down. He asked to be turned upside down, saying he didn’t deserve to be crucified in the same position as His LORD and Master.

How many caregivers are walking on a path we would never have chosen willingly?

About six months into my marriage a wise and lovely older lady at church looked at me and said, “This wasn’t what you signed up for, was it?”

Hospital stay, doctor’s visits, jobless, sick husband, and no diagnosis it was terribly frustrating position to be in.

My friend didn’t pretend to understand all about my situation, but her words of kindness and sympathy have traveled with me all these years.

Did I mention I was pregnant?

Being pregnant was both the fulfillment of a long-awaited desire and my worst nightmare at that point. I was so excited AND scared.

How was I going to provide for our child on single salary?  What on earth was wrong with my husband? Why couldn’t he just pull it together?

Our car was repossessed in the middle of the night — actually due to no fault of our own.  Our payments showed as debited from our bank account and the credit company didn’t receive them. The bank admitted the payments were set, but neither bank or credit company would take responsibility for payments “lost in cyber-limbo”. A lawyer told us we could never win a fight against two big companies with deep pockets.

In fact, now the credit company asked for about half of what was owed in order for us to get our car back.

Utterly impossible to cough up that money in our situation! We were paying out of pocket for specialists’ visits on a very small salary.  We lost our car.

Being repo’d in Maryland is akin to organized thievery. We had valuables inside that car that were never returned to us. We lost our car AND the belongings inside.

Amazingly our credit score was clean because the bank admitted it wasn’t our fault. It just wasn’t their fault, either, according to them.

My personal opinion is that the credit company and the repo company were in cahoots. Thieves. Enough said. Their day in front of a just Judge is coming.

Then our landlord decided to sell the cheap apartment house we were renting. The new owners decided to fix the foundation and jacked up the house too swiftly.

Yes, we were living there. My husband was sick in bed when the walls and floor began to heave.

One week before my daughter was born, I came home from work to crooked doorframes and cracks that ran along the joints of wall and ceiling. It looked like an earthquake had hit.

Miraculously, we qualified for a small home loan, due to no car payment and a decent credit score (and looser lending rules)!

God took care of us despite the cruel and unjust loss of our car. Thankfully we still owned an old beater car that was completely paid for.

A week after our daughter was born, we moved. God has kept this roof over our heads for almost 13 years.

There has been nothing easy about this journey, though. Not one single easy year! However, our Good Shepherd has never, ever left or forsaken us.

Peter speaks pointedly and lovingly, too, about fiery trials. He faced a hostile government, spent time in prison, and ended up giving his life for his faith in Christ.

You have had to suffer various trials, in order that the genuineness of your faith, which is more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tried by fire, may be found to result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ,

           Whom having not seen, you love; and in Whom, though you do not see Him now, you believe and you rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory, receiving as the result of your faith the salvation of your souls.” I Peter 1:6-9

While we hold on to hope and reach for moments of joy, the only true joy is found in loving Jesus.

Ah, the other piece of sage advice from my lovely friend.  “Not what you signed up for? Just know your husband can never meet all your needs. You need to be satisfied with Jesus.”

She then told me how poor and broke they were in their first year of marriage. No baby crib, just a blanket folded into an open dresser drawer for their little one.

 I’ve forgotten the other details but it was clear –  her first year of marriage wasn’t what she signed up for.

One of these days we’re going to meet our perfect Bridegroom. Peter describes this as “joy unspeakable and full of glory”.

It just doesn’t get any better than this. The best is yet to come!

We already know how much He loves us — freely, fully, without any good reason to love us. He just does. He has told us that nothing can separate us from His love. He’s committed to us for the long haul.

I’ve had three ladies tell me personally in the past few years how their husbands just decided they were done with the marriage. Just done and up and left.  No more relationship.  The pain in their eyes ripped at my heart.

At points in caregiving, you may feel like your husband’s left you in another senses. One dear lady put it this way, “My husband after his injury just checks out. It’s like he’s stopped trying!” She felt so very alone.

Chronic illness is a physical and mental battle. So is caregiving.

I wouldn’t trade places to experience the pain and physical suffering.

But being a loving caregiver is also an excruciatingly fiery trial at times. Anyone who says differently hasn’t walked in our shoes for very long. Probably never.

You and I are left scrambling to keep all the ducks from tumbling over the Niagra Falls.  Forget keeping the ducks in a row!

The only one Who truly understands is Jesus. It’s a good thing He’s our High Priest and no one else. There isn’t another living soul I’d trust to intercede for me before God.

“For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize wiht our weaknesses, but One who was in every sense tempted like we are, yet without sin. Let us then come with confidence to the throne of grace, that we might obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:15-16

Christ is our sympathetic Bridegroom. He already has His ear and heart tuned to hear us. We have His full and undivided sympathetic attention when we enter into His Presence. How often does that happen in this age of cell phones and technology?

The road we wouldn’t have chosen is taking us to glory — where we will see our glorious Jesus face to face.

“I Can Only Imagine” was played at my sister’s funeral last year.

Can you imagine? Love like no other awaits at the end.